Moving with children after divorce; is it allowed?
After the (real) divorce, it often happens that the primary caregiver wants to move with the children to build a new life somewhere else. The desire to move can be prompted by a new partner, a new job, etc.
Can you just move? The answer to this question depends on whether you have joint parental authority with the other parent of the children. If this is the case, this means that important decisions about the children must be made together. A decision to move is such a decision.
What if the other parent does not agree with the desired move and does not give permission? It goes without saying that proper consultation must first take place. Preferably under the guidance of a mediator. If this consultation leads to nothing, then there is actually only one option and that is to ask the judge for permission for the move.
The parent who wants to move with the children can ask the court for substitute permission to move. What are the chances of success?
First and foremost, everyone has the freedom in principle to build a new life somewhere else. It is tested whether this freedom can be reconciled with the interests of all parties involved and in particular the interests of the children.
In 2008, the Supreme Court ruled that the interests of all parties involved must be weighed when making a decision about the relocation. The interests of the child are paramount, but are not the only interests that must be taken into account. For the ruling, see:
In the lower courts, the criterion formulated by the Supreme Court has been further elaborated. The following is important:
- Is there a need to move?
This need may be financial, a new job or having a relationship with a new partner who is financially tied to the place or country to which one is moving, etc. - Is there already a parenting plan?
If not, this needs to be done, discussing a scenario with and without relocation. If there is a plan, what does it say? - What is the moving distance?
What is the distance and have agreements already been made about this in the parenting plan? - Has the desired move been prepared?
Has housing been provided? Do the children have a place at a new school? Will everyone (if necessary) receive a residence permit? Etc. - How can childcare be organised after the move and will the existing care arrangements change significantly?
It is often clear that the number of care or contact days will be reduced by the move. The question is how this can be compensated for the other parent. Think of extra vacation days, a different division of the weekends, scheduling Skype or telephone moments, etc. - Will the move entail high costs for maintaining contact with the parent who is left behind? Who will bear these costs?
If a move, for example abroad, involves high costs and these costs are insurmountable, this means a decrease in contact between the children and the parent who is left behind. This can be a contraindication for the judge to grant permission for the move. - What do the children think about it?
In the Netherlands, children aged 12 and over have the right to be heard by the judge (in all cases that affect their interests). This means that they can make their opinion known to the judge. This can be done by writing a note or visiting the judge. This visit is not a formal hearing and the parents are not present. The child has no right to choose with whom it wants to live. Are you curious about how a child hearing works? View this movie - To what extent are the parents still able to communicate with each other after the move?
Are you considering a move and you don't know if the other parent agrees? Or does the other parent want to move with the children and you object to this? Then contact contact contact us for further advice.
